"The future is easy because it doesn't exist, but the past is painful because it lives forever"

-Fred Durst

"Engineers call them edge cases. I call them: what our users do."

-- Unknown

"Never underestimate the determination of an engineer to abandon all best practices in light of solving a tough problem."

--Sorry, I don't recall where this came from

"Grammar is not a time of waste"

- Nancy Cartwright

I have a photographic memory. Sadly, i usually leave the lens-cap on.

- Posted by Phil Factor on twitter

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
- Albert Einstein

The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite insane.

- Nikola Tesla

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom

1. I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good, either.

2. I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

3. I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

4. Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car.

5. There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives.

6. Tell me what you need and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

7. Accept that some days you're the pigeon and some days you're the statue.

8. Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time you need him, chances are you won't be needing him again.

9. I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

10. Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, "Where the heck is the ceiling?"

11. My Reality Check bounced.

12. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the Escape key.

13. I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.

14. You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

15. Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons because, to them, you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

16. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

17. Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level.

18. Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?

BILL Gates' SPEECH TO MT. WHITNEY HIGH SCHOOL in Visalia, California.

Worthwhile reading for anyone. Love him or hate him, he sure hits the nail on the head with this!

To anyone with kids of any age, or anyone who has ever been a kid, here's some advice Bill Gates recently dished out at a high school speech about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it

Rule 2: The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will NOT make $40,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping -- they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parents' generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine

-Unknown

The great tragedy of Science - the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact.

-Thomas H. Huxley (1825 - 1895)

Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff.

- Frank Zappa

Saying what we think gives us a wider conversational range than saying what we know.

- Cullen Hightower

Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.

- Douglas Adams

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?

- Laurence J. Peter

The will to be stupid is a very powerful force, but there are always alternatives.

- Lois McMaster Bujold

When two men in business always agree, one of them is unnecessary.

- William Wrigley Jr.

I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this.
- Emo Phillips

I hope that when I die, people say about me, 'Boy, that guy sure owed me a lot of money.'

- Jack Handey

"She doesn't eat meat, she suffers from vegetarism"

~Brett Slaski

Don't worry about people stealing an idea. If it's original, you will have to ram it down their throats.
- Howard Aiken

Ask a deeply religious Christian if he’d rather live next to a bearded Muslim that may or may not be plotting a terror attack, or an atheist that may or may not show him how to set up a wireless network in his house. On the scale of prejudice, atheists don’t seem so bad lately.
  - Scott Adams

Study without desire spoils the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in.
  - Leonardo da Vinci

If there were no God, there would be no Atheists.

- G. K. Chesterton

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

- Jay Leno