Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.

- Douglas Adams

If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what is the significance of a clean desk?

- Laurence J. Peter

The will to be stupid is a very powerful force, but there are always alternatives.

- Lois McMaster Bujold

When two men in business always agree, one of them is unnecessary.

- William Wrigley Jr.

I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this.
- Emo Phillips

I hope that when I die, people say about me, 'Boy, that guy sure owed me a lot of money.'

- Jack Handey

"She doesn't eat meat, she suffers from vegetarism"

~Brett Slaski

Don't worry about people stealing an idea. If it's original, you will have to ram it down their throats.
- Howard Aiken

Ask a deeply religious Christian if he’d rather live next to a bearded Muslim that may or may not be plotting a terror attack, or an atheist that may or may not show him how to set up a wireless network in his house. On the scale of prejudice, atheists don’t seem so bad lately.
  - Scott Adams

Study without desire spoils the memory, and it retains nothing that it takes in.
  - Leonardo da Vinci

If there were no God, there would be no Atheists.

- G. K. Chesterton

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

- Jay Leno

I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline.

I Got a freakin' call center in Pakistan .

I told them I was suicidal. They got all
excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.

- George Carlin

If the human mind was simple enough to understand, we'd be too simple to understand it.
- Emerson Pugh

Being at the end of a job and needing to un-delete quickly teaches you not to bypass the recycle bin.

-bcs

With the more trial and error you do, the less trial and error you'll do.

~Brettski

I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.

- Augusten Burroughs

"A crisis is a terrible thing to waste"

~ Paul Romer

It's just the sign of the times; Going forward in reverse. still, he who laughs last is just a hand in the bush

"No More Tears"
Ozzy Osbourne

"You miss 100% of the shots you never take."

--Wayne Gretzky

There art two cardinal sins from which all others spring: Impatience and Laziness.
- Franz Kafka

I am falling apart, one clot at a time

--Anon

...but my mother always told me that if you’re not irritating some people, you’re not doing anything interesting.

-- Guy Kawasaki's Mom
source

It doesn't really get busier any given day, just more stuff doesn't get done.

~Brett Slaski